Welcome to the BLOGBUDDZ’s first ever game review: Today we’ll be reviewing a rather divisive game today, known for causing it’s gaming franchise’s fans to question the morality of it’s own protagonist. A game that’s more well-known as “Kirby’s Fucking Pissed” among the internet than by it’s actual title, Kirby: Squeak Squad. 

Like all Kirby games, it’s darkness and extensive lore is not visible in the slightest when you start it; The first thing you see in game with Kirby enjoying a piece of nice, delicious, strawberry cake. 

“That doesn’t sound too bad,” you might ask. “It’s just a pink gumball eating cake: Just how horrifying can it be?” Well, that’s when you notice that you’re wrong…

Kirby beats up an entire game’s worth of enemies and bosses, over a slice of cake. This didn’t bode well with Kirby’s fans, as they were more used to the cutesy, innocent Kirby the other 14 years worth of games before Squeak Squad had. (Hal Labs eventually reverted back to the aforementioned “good Kirby” in Kirby games post-Squeak Squad as well, but the damage had already been done: The “Kirby is Evil” theories and disturbingly-realistic internet fan-art still persisted, and Kirby’s reputation was never the same since…)

…That’s basically the entire plot of the game. Well, that, and you fight this installment’s titular Squeak Squad.The Squeak Squad are rats. They’re rats. They’re the rats. They prey at night, they stalk at night, they’re the rats. Their leader Daroach is even a giant rat that makes all of the rules. The trouble they got themselves into was stealing Kirby’s cake. (…Which is conveniently located in the same treasure chest as the game’s true antagonist.)

Keep in mind that Kirby Squeak Squad was made only eight years before the release of Jerma985’s legendary Rat Movie: Mystery of the Mayan Treasure. (and it’s 2015 sequel, Rat Movie 2.) Does this mean the Squeak Squad are the predecessors to the rats we see in the RAT MOVIE MOVIES!?

Gameplay-wise, it’s like pretty much every other Kirby platformer: You can fly, you suck up foes and gain their abilities, you even fight King Dedede and Meta Knight like in a lot of other Kirby games, etc. However, you can see inside Kirby’s stomach from the Nintendo DS’s bottom screen, so there’s that, I guess…

Overall, there isn’t a lot to say about this game. The lore is surprisingly small for a Kirby game, which isn’t surprising considering the complete lack of Escargoon and the extensive lore surrounding him.

While Kirby: Squeak Squad is a still nice game, (After all, Kirby truly has no bad video games!) it’s not exactly one of the highest priority ones you need to play in the franchise: It’s pretty simple lore-wise, and about as remarkable as any other platformer in the series is gameplay-wise….

Well, unless you’re a die-hard Kirby fan, a Rat Movie fanatic, a “Kirby is Evil” theorist, or already finished with Super Star/Air Ride/Planet Robobot: Then this game should be a priority to play.

OUR SCORE: 5.2 [Needs more Escargoon.]

Last-Minute Fun Fact: When you play Kirby Squeak Squad on your birthday, you are greeted with a “Happy Birthday” screen. (It even greets you with a nice little song!)

…I know this because it’s my birthday (or at least in EASTERN STANDARD TIME, where and when this article was written), so I’m sharing the surprise this game gave me with you. Enjoy?